Looking at Speculative Fiction from Another Dimension.

The Thing (2011) Reviews From the Haters and Trolls.

MacReady like Streebo surveys the wreckage of the prequel fallout.

In the interest of being fair and balanced like Fox News here aboard the Mutantville Mothership I thought we would take a look at some more reviews for the prequel to John Carpenter’s 1982 classic The Thing.  I posted my review of The Thing (2011) here and on Youtube and have been fielding comments from across the web about the film ever since.  It is interesting to note that not everyone shares my enthusiasm about the film.  In the interest of showing all sides of horror fandom, I’ve decided to share some comments from the trolls and haters that I’ve gathered from across the internet.

(Find the trolls under your bridge after the leap!)

For the purpose of this article – Streebo’s definition of a “hater” is anyone that tells others to avoid a film without ever giving it a chance.  Every movie/book/TV show is someone’s favorite – and if you’re not counted among it’s fans – then don’t be so quick to dismiss it when others are responding to it in a positive manner.  That makes you a disciple of Haterism and if you spread that attitude across the net – it makes you a troll to all of fandom.  As a critic’s critic, a working filmmaker and commentator on the genre myself – I’ve taken up the task of routing out all of the trolls from fandom and criticdom at large.  You can thank me later.

HATER CLUB ROLL CALL!!!

Our first Hater up at bat is my buddy Pizowell.  Pizowell offers fun reviews and videos on his channel but unfortunately crosses into the realm of Haterism in his review for The Thing.  He starts the hater ball rolling when he tries to dismiss the entire movie by the title of his review alone.  It’s alright to criticize a movie for it’s faults but to tell everyone to avoid it when many others enjoyed it – moves good old Pizowell into the realm of Haterism.

Here, I’ll let the man speak for himself.

 

Feel free to respond to Pizowell on his own channel.  Notice that despite the fact that I disagree with pretty much every word out of his mouth except the implication that he is not frightened by big slimy vaginas with jagged teeth – which mind you frighten me quite a bit – I never descend to the level of telling you to avoid Pizowell or try to dismiss his reviews by belittling him.  He has his own opinion and I have mine.  Unfortunately, his opinion is just wrong.

2011 Critics hold true to 1982 Tradition.

TROLLS CAN TYPE TOO!!!

Now let’s move on to some more Haters from the internet.  This time we have some interesting posts that I discovered on the IMDB page for The Thing (2011).  In short, this particular individual disliked the prequel because he feels that it didn’t properly tie in to John Carpenter’s The Thing as he felt it should.  I was surprised at this because when I watched the movie – I thought it tied in to Carpenter’s work quite nicely.  But lest this individual feels that I’m misrepresenting him – I’ll let him speak for himself.

Dare I say that SPOILERS ensue!?! Skip past the quotes if you want to avoid spoilers.

From the IMDb board for The Thing (2011):

mr_blonde3

It did perhaps, mess with the continuity of the ’82 film.

In Carpenter’s film, at the start, the Norwegian who is shooting at the dog is wearing a parka with fur on the hood. This Norwegian also mishandles the grenade, and when you watch the film, the Norwegian with the fur-lined parka is also the one who is digging for the grenade, and gets blown up.

The Norwegian with the rifle, who is screaming at the Americans that the dog isn’t a dog, clearly is wearing a parka with no furl-lined hood. This same Norwegian also exits the helicopter with the gun, on the right hand side (The pilot’s seat) and is the one who screams about the grenade before running away.

According to mrsnickman, when Lars gets into the helicopter before they begin chasing the dog, he’s wearing a parka without a fur-lined hood. This means that, either Lars learned how to pilot the helicopter and took over mid-flight, or this is a someone major goof on the part of the filmmakers.

Also, look at the credits of Carpenter’s film. The credits are:

Norwegian: Norbert Weisser

Norwegian passenger with rifle: Larry J. Franco

That means that Franco is the Norwegian in the fur-lined parka to start the film, and Weisser is the Norwegian who screams at the Americans and is shot by Garry. Further proof is on Norbert Weisser’s web page.

As you can see from the photos, Weisser is the Norwegian who is pictured as the one who yells at the others, and gets shot by Garry. That means, in order for Lars to be Jans Bolen, he would have had to have been the pilot of the helicopter, since the Norwegian who fires at the dog while in flight, and gets blown up, is wearing a parka with a fur hood, and is clearly blown up.

Therefore, at the end of the prequel, when Lars takes up the shooter’s position, he is Larry J. Franco. The pilot, who is the REAL Norwegian that Garry shoots, is actually Matias.

Woops.

The only way for the prequel scenario to work would be if Lars took over flying the helicopter. But then the logical thing would be that Lars would be flying the helicopter on the left-hand side (Remember when Mac and Copper take off for the Norwegian base? There’s two sets of controls)

Matias is flying the helicopter on the right-hand side, so in order for Matias to be shooting out of the left side of the helicopter, they’d have had to switch seats mid flight, or land. Why do that when there are two sets of controls, and Lars could have taken the left seat and passed the gun to Matias, and Matias could have shot at the dog from the right side of the helicopter.”

mr_blonde2 continues:

“Well and this is more than just a matter of a difference of clothing. According to the filmmakers, Lars is supposed to be who Jans Bolen was in Carpenter’s, And based on Carpenter’s, due to clothing, lack of binnoculars, the way it was filmed, etc, the shooter who starts the film is blown up. He has a rip in his sleeve and a fur parka, and you see the rip in his sleeve d the fur parka one last time before he’s blown up by the grenade. The one Garry shoots is clearly not wearing a parka that is fur-lined around the hood, and clearly has no tear in his sleeve. This means the Norwegian Garry shot is CONCLUSIVELY the pilot.

So in order to seamlessly transition both films, Lars has to learn how to fly, and Matias has to be the shooter who starts Carpenter’s. Did they mention at all that Lars could fly? No.

And I can’t remember. Anyone else who’s seen the prequel, does Lars have a tear in his left sleeve? If he does, then they’re wrong, plain and simple. Guy with ripped sleeve dies in explosion. Jans Bolen is shot by Garry.”

The Thing (2011) Prequel Kicks Ass!


I don’t really know how to respond to this without being insulting but I can only guess that this individual is a troll of the highest order.  Trolls will be trolls so take that as you will.  I’ve been criticized as liking too many movies but I feel justified in saying that I am in fact a Superfan.

I enjoy the movies and the arts and what they bring to us.  I watch the movies I watch not because I have to or am paid to do so – but because I am doing what I love.  Some people live in worlds where they project negativity into everything they see.  I call it like I see it and if it is good I’ll gladly say so.  Generally when I really dislike something you hardly ever hear me mention it.  Trolls and haters feel the need to constantly spew their negative views on the rest of us – neglecting to spend some time doing what they came into this genre for in the first place – and that is to enjoy a movie.

If you’re going to make the effort to be a troll or hater – then do it in style. As we leave out – we’ll take a look at an exemplary piece of Haterism. Someone took the time to edit footage from Carpenter’s 1982 version of The Thing into a vid of them all watching scenes from the new The Thing prequel. The results are truly hilarious and should stand as an example of Haterism and Troll Mastery to all.

Know your trolls and haters and know how to deal with them  but in the end support the genre you love and support the movies that you want to see by paying to see them at the theater, on VOD or on DVD/Blu Ray.  This public service announcement has been brought to you by Streebo.  Feel free to leave me a comment on all of this in the section below.

 

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